“We’ve got to make it work, or we’ll be seen as failures,” he urged me. Every time we tried to “make it work,” it became harder to end things. It took me six years to realize I was being abused—and then I feared I was a failure because I’d been hoodwinked and lured in under false pretenses.
I’m not the only woman who feels she’s defective if she’s been abused. Actually, I was merely falling prey to the social prejudice that a woman isn’t believed when she’s abused—instead, she’s blamed. But once I cut through the smoke and mirrors, deep within my gut, I knew I was doing the most courageous thing ever by walking away.
Because I understood one truth: I had outgrown him. I had outgrown my narcissist. As I tell my clients these days, a jungle cannot flourish in a pot. If you, too, have outgrown a narcissist, here are four other things you’ve outgrown as well.